A week of preparing and finally schools are open. The timing couldn’t have been better, this breather was much needed. Time alone, can be a very rare thing for a parent. And even when you finally have it, you can’t seem to forget your to-do list and focus on yourself. But the space every once in a while, is an absolute necessity, otherwise you crumble. Motherhood has been described as being on a roller coaster that never stops. It can feel beautiful, challenging, rewarding, overwhelming and scary all at the same time. And as I’ve come to know, this is pretty normal for most parents. But you learn to embrace and work through all that as part of the journey.
Motherhood is a gift with lessons all wrapped up in a tiny package. It changes the dynamics of your life so much to the point where you don’t remember how it use to be. And yet some choose it, some even plan for it, while others learn to embrace it once it’s here. I look at my life and a lot has changed; my lifestyle, my habits and my relationships. My life has expanded too in ways I wouldn’t have thought possible. It’s been greatest and hardest and still I wouldn’t trade this experience for anything else in the world. The lessons, they just keep coming, below are some of what I’ve picked up on my way here.
- Quitting is not always the option; This is what my dad told me, when I quit my first job after a week. I didn’t understand it then but now I do. Once you have a child, you don’t get to check out and change your mind whenever you feel like it. It’s a lifetime commitment, enjoy the sweet moments when they are here, survive the low moments and you stay on the path. I’ve learnt that it’s okay to take a quick break when I need to, ask for support when I feel my strength is running out, but throwing in the towel and saying am done isn’t an option. If I give up, am giving up on her too.
- Patience; The terrible twos then, the tantrums and many other episodes after, have taught me to always hang in there longer than I normally would. I’ve learnt that some things kids do, are just tests and how you respond to all these is important. You teach them how to behave by how you respond. I’ve had to cultivate this great value and now I can gladly say I have survived moments when she’s acting out without losing my cool.
- Trust in myself; I remember back when my daughter was born, it was a scary moment because I had no prior experience as a mom. She was this little human being so fragile that was dependent on me and I didn’t think I could handle her. But step by step I learnt the basics and before I knew it I was good, then better. I still have moments when am not sure what am doing. But I’ve made some progress from first day of parenting.
- Responsibility; I’ve dropped the impulsiveness and instead learnt to think things through, weigh options before I make any major decisions. Am more cautious, maybe even more than I should be but this has kept me from making any rash decisions that I may regret later. She is looking up to me so I’ve learnt to be reliable and consistent.
- Every moment is valuable; They grow up so fast, and before you know it those little things they do that melt your heart become only memories. So, I’ve learnt to be really present, savor the sweet moments; tiny tight hugs, the good morning and goodnight kisses, and learn from the tough moments. The beauty of life lies not in the grand gestures but in simple gestures of care and love.
Parenting is one of the boldest and daring adventures through which we learn but, life generally is full of lessons for those eager to learn. I will not try to be an expert, since I know there is no such thing in parenting. But I will be open to learning every day and do the best I can and love unconditionally at all times.
“The child supplies the power, but the parents have to do the steering“ Benjamin Spock.
Be Inspired to live your best life every day.